By Emily Citro

Even the nicest person you know probably has someone who gets under their skin—maybe just a little bit.  Haven’t you even just wanted to send them a package filled with a big, glistening pile of…glitter?  That’s right, what could be more genuinely, innocuously annoying than an envelope filled with the sparkling craft supply?

If you belong to any social networks, you probably saw this link go viral last week: Ship Your Enemies Glitter.  Sure there are more dramatic or masterful ways of getting even, but when does stooping to your rival’s level ever really satisfy?  But cleaning up unexpected glitter is just innocently irritating enough to ruin an evening and not much else (ladies who have done glitter crafts, am I right?)  Best of all, glitter can be sent anonymously so you will never be linked to the “crime,” unless you put too much information in the included note or are too boastful about your successful glitter strike ops.

And besides, few other events in life allow you to utter villainous catch-phrases like: “Leave the glitter, take the revenge,” or “You’ve been sparkled!” or “I’m sending you on an all-expenses paid trip to crafting hell,” or “Why so sparkly?” or “Come to the glitter side.” Or “No Mr. Bond, I expect you to shimmer.”

Evil-doers everywhere, prepare your mailboxes.

Emily has been working with me for almost 2 years now as a marketing assistant on my team.  She graduated from Adelphi University with a Bachelors’ in English with a creative writing focus and previously worked in property management.  She and her fiancé are set to wed in 2015, and she has recently become a hot yoga devotee.